After being holed up in my mansion, doing secret things that I won't tell you I am out.

Jokes aside, the month was a bit a boring, not gonna lie, but isn’t it part of life? To be bored? To live with your own thoughts?

End of the month, 30th, is day I turn 39 years. Can't believe six months have passed since raid on Silverymoon. Cannot believe been up here for so long. How long will it take to get home? Half a year is nothing to my kin, but feels so long here.... At least receive best present could get: Working. Will be working that day.

This month... have learned to grapple with feelings. Is ... odd thing to say. Very odd thing to do for me. Used to, not have them. But surface allows for more freedoms. One of them is freedom to feel. And now that I can feel, want, yearn, hurt.... it is... different. I used to not deal with any of this.

My family has helped. Arlis has helped. Lief has helped. Yashir and Solia have helped.

Work has been slow, and that has been hard deal with. Left feeling useless. Unproductive. But those who care have helped.

My strength was sapped for a while. Less a punishment, like feared, more a warning. A reminder that must keep focus, must keep fighting even though life seems... so different, now. So strange, now. And, while with Ssrin... heard... some song. Some calling. have reject it, but think I know who it was.

Something about that... terrify me. And makes me angry. And makes me want fight, at same time. But somehow... makes me think, may relate to purpose here.

I want more work. I want work harder. Has been good, helping Yashir at Shining Peaks, sparring and competing. Met a new Knight at Syndicate and have been train her up. Just want keep working hard, not losing part of self that keeps fighting.

Jack:

What is there even to write? I arrived by the edge of death, and have continued along it since I got here.

But that seems to be the catch with this place, isn't it? The price of kindness and kinship. I do not miss the moonsea.

State of the Syndicate, Marpenoth 1502 D.R.

I've little that I care to write here. Work has actually picked up a little bit for me, which is a blessing. It takes my mind off of things I would rather not think about. Dragons, undead, horsemen... Briarfael has returned, thank the elements.

I am trying to maintain a professional attitude, but enough has happened which I do not wish to write about to complicate matters greatly for me. I have begun to consider moving on from the Syndicate. The roots I had set down are not as firmly... rooted... as I had hoped. I've made no decisions as yet; just something to think about.

-- Yashir adh Rumahr

What news have I, but to say I've arrived? How very fortunate for those of the Syndicate.

The mercenaries here are receptive, their training facilities adequate, and the work on my villa proceeds apace. I've found, in my time, more than one willing sparring partner, including one of such vast power as to be breathtaking in more ways than one.

It's nearly enough to keep the homesickness at bay.

Signed,
Elysia Vaelthorn

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Where to begin?
Missions have been had, near death of friends experienced, but we've managed to get through the worst of it. The newest generation of adventurers is eager, hah! But that eagerness... It can lead to them biting off more than they can chew. We're lucky they all had soul directives to return.

That's been the most pressing thing on my mind, journal.
How can we keep the younger generation alive?

Some of them distrust me because they say "I smile too easily." It's the third or perhaps fourth time my kindness has been taken as malicious intent. Would that I could write their paranoia doesn't bother me. Among the number, Lukan, a man who looks like he could be my sibling, really. I've taken to mentally calling him 'little cousin' but I do avoid saying it aloud; rather not get stabbed.

I work toward providing winter gifts for the Syndicate. It's an attempt to answer that earlier question, 'how to keep them alive,' but in part too simply to bring some holiday joy. It's been a heavy year for many. Opening wrapped presents might help to alleviate that stress. I think Rokka has agreed to help me? Biscuit is labeled 'perhaps,' her promises of aid dependent on her fluctuating commissions, and Yashir has offered to help with the costs.

With everyone pitching in, I think this might be truly possible.
I've been hammering night and day, if not for a gift, then a commission to pay for a gift. My arms are sore, but my heart is full, and even should they all pull their help, I will not stop until I've made enough gifts to spread some cheer to the newest generation.

- Cyrus

The days have been tranquil for me this month... no combat to speak of. Clangeddin would not approve. This month I've dedicated myself to Dugmaren. My knowledge of monsters is lacking and so is my hability to understand them.
I've struggled against dragons in the past. So I learned draconic. I'm sure I will struggle against giants in the future, so I've dedicated myself to learn the different types of giants. I'm also learning how to speak giant. So I'm ready for trouble, wouldn't want to be turn into paste by insulting a giant's mother... unless it's on purpose.