We were given remarkably little information about this mission. I eventually abandoned any hope of understanding what had transpired. From what I could gather, the party had visited a carnival the previous day and left behind a gentleman named Wilber, who was apparently a druid. Why they left him behind, and why this had become our problem, remained unclear.
Wesley insisted upon formal introductions and, to my considerable displeasure, forced us to wear the most odious blue nametags. They clashed horribly with my mourning attire. I cannot imagine what possessed him to believe such things were necessary.
Among those introduced was a rather fleshy-looking Talune, who identified himself as a dragonborn paladin of Selûne. I made my disapproval of his life choices quite clear, particularly his unfortunate lack of a tail. I much prefer the deceased Talune. Death has apparently done wonders for his character.
Our destination was Pottsfield, a settlement just up the road from Willow Creek. During the journey, I was informed that a group of friendly undead had been operating a carnival there. The previous day's festivities had apparently been proceeding quite pleasantly until a group of Quakers attacked.
Naturally, the party killed them.
Given my extensive experience riding Lola's bone, I considered myself exceptionally qualified to rent the Skeleton Bundle from Stablemen's Stables and Carriages. Unfortunately, the package also included a hideous polyester skeleton costume. I cannot imagine an occasion on which I would willingly wear such a thing. The material alone is an offense against good taste, and the imitation bones are anatomically insulting.
We eventually arrived at the Autumn Carnival, where we encountered a maypole named Enoch. Surrounding him were the corpses of several Quakers, rather unceremoniously displayed upon stakes.
Among the deceased was Wilber, the very gentleman we had been sent to retrieve. Apparently, Enoch intended to assimilate his remains and was rather unwilling to surrender them.
Rather than immediately resolving the matter, we elected to enjoy the carnival attractions. Ethan remained behind to speak with Enoch, although I was too far away to hear the conversation and, quite frankly, insufficiently interested to investigate.
I visited a fortune teller, which proved to be a rather unpleasant experience. At some point during our interaction, I developed a dreadful headache and experienced a peculiar sense of detachment from myself. For several moments, I struggled to recall even the simplest things.
I found the experience deeply unsettling. I have always considered my mind to be one of my more dependable organs, and I do not appreciate having its contents rearranged without my permission.
Fortunately, the carnival offered more agreeable diversions.
I consumed five pies.
Pumpkin remains my favorite.
Later, however, I found myself participating in a most undignified wrestling competition against a woman named Rotting Corpse. The contest required us to wrestle in the nude, in an enormous quantity of pumpkin pie filling.
I assure you, despite the rather suggestive circumstances, there was absolutely nothing erotic about the experience. Nothing whatsoever. I also declined to eat any of that pie afterward.
Between the various games and attractions, I accumulated enough tickets to purchase a rather lovely piece of armor. My companions, demonstrating their usual questionable priorities, spent most of their winnings on candy.
I suppose everyone has their own idea of a worthwhile investment.
All things considered, it was a rather pleasant outing, provided one overlooks the unexplained memory disturbance, the publicly displayed corpses, the questionable sanitation practices, and the fact that we had largely neglected the mission we were sent to accomplish until the very last moment.
