Wesley told us that we need to go to a village near Mount Vidal. Strange “children” are running around and harrassing people. Things are getting set on fire. There is lava popping up. They are said to stand like they are trying to poop their pants. Real children yearn for the mines. These are not children. They are offering each of us 200 gold pieces to resolve the issue.
Wesley gave us keys to the boat. Knick isn’t allowed to drive due to a grand theft auto incident where they crashed one boat. Or several. This was unclear. However, it was clarified that no one should put wheels on a boat and then run people over. Knick thought it sounded like a good idea after 4 rums. Gideon told her she drinks wrong. Whiskey all the way. She says it’s too bitter.
The scam started immediately after arriving. Knick wanted to know about pay for the travel that was promised. Nonsense. Gideon told me not to snitch. The woman that she was trying to extort let us know that Zebidiah from the philosophy club at community college joined the military and was overseas, but he’s back in town.
I went to speak with Zebidiah and he was a wealth of information. So much so that we decided to ignore the rest of the village.
He told us that the creatures come in the morning. Arrows and greatswords phase through them. They have the weird stance that toddlers make when they are pooping. They can definitely set stuff on fire. They are medium-sized. For sure. They wear suspenders and diapers. Only have three toes. This is on each foot, not total. When they come, they set things on fire, take food, and leave. He thinks they are coming from just right down the road. There is a cave with a lot of lava in it. The lava is new since they showed up.
He also filled us in that Matilda is distraught because one of them took her barrel of pomegrante wine. She had to import them! She did not want mead and refused to add honey per Zebidiah’s suggestion.
We should head north past the second sign that says This Way. Ignore the first sign that says This Way. It leads the wrong way. In their village everyone works and gets the benefit, but no one wants to work.
Zebidiah business is rebuilding vintage chariots. Every once in a while people in their later years in life stop on in. Generally they are wearing leather jackets. He advertises his services on the little blue pills from the pharmacy. His last name is Johnson, and the pharmacist he bribes is also named Johnson. What a side hustle!
Knick tried to scheme with me acting as Wesley. Absolutely not.
Incontinent clown came out of the lava and went back in. I threw a rock in the lava and 8 mephits came out. I dug deep and pulled out a nightmare shroud of pure fear. 6 of them dropped on the spot.
We went deeper in to the cave and found 4 diaper babies and three tar dinosaur elementals. I very quickly ran around unleashing fear on all of them.
The bad person still has a fixation of harming children. He swung his metal weapons at the diaper babies repeatedly after being told it wouldn’t work. Even after seeing it with his own two eyes he continued to try. He eventually wised up and punched one to death. Then continued to punch it. What a monster.
Knick looked very crusty. Qualia turned her into a misty cloud, and invited her into her water skin.
We found fireweaver gloves on one of the diaper babies. I kept them.
Qualia had party invitations and candles that didn’t match. She may in fact be a child.
