Brave adventurers! On this most sacred of Sundays (well, actually, its Wednesday), when bells ring, candles burn, and the snow politely pretends it isn’t trying to kill you—Saarivalkea issues a call.

A holy relic has been misplaced. Not “lost,” mind you—misplaced. As in: “We had it a moment ago,” and now the priests are staring at each other like guilty children and insisting it was definitely not their fault.

Last year, a band of heroes attempted this quest.

This year… we are doing it again, because repeating history is tradition, and besides: there will be NEW TWISTS, NEW ABSURDITIES, and at least one fresh reason to shout “NEVERMIND” while running away.